Australia recently passed a ban on social media use for minors under the age of 16, and other countries look to be doing similar things too. I am strongly opposed to this measure, but to begin with, I want to get one thing out of the way: I understand the motive behind this. The harms of social media are well-documented in contributing to negative self-image and right-wing extremism, and while I think some tend to overdramatize the effects for shock value (like in The Social Dilemma), these are massive concerns. The kids are depressed and alt-right. As you can see, these are pretty simple reasons. Simple is also how I would describe the thought process behind Australia’s measure. Legislators thought, “ooh, there’s a problem with this thing, how about we ban it?” and pretty much left it at that.
Regulations like these come from a protect-the-children perspective that tries to come up with a moral argument for such restrictions to garner popular support, especially if they lead to invasions of privacy. Those arguments have been made with many, and while I agree with them, my opposition is also due to something else. The problem is, in the midst of discussions of bills like this, there’s a perspective that’s being left behind, the marginalized teens who, for whatever reason, are unable to build meaningful connections in their physical environment. For these people, the people they get to know and connect with online are an important and positive element of their lives, and taking that away would be a net negative. I know this very well because I was one of them.
When I was a kid in elementary school, I was quite an outgoing and sociable person. I loved to read and learn about things, and naturally I wanted to share my interests with others. The problem was, those around me did not reciprocate. At best, people just didn’t understand how to interact with me, and saw me as a novelty. At worst, they excluded me, told their kids to distance themselves from me, or acted antagonistic to the point my parents chose to uproot themselves as well as me to help get away from all that. As I grew older, things did improve a bit and weren’t as bad as my original elementary school, but I still felt an insurmountable social gap between myself and my peers. It was a pretty lonely time.
In 2020, that changed. With free time on my hands, I started to spend more time on my hobbies, and in particular, I joined online forums and group chats related to them. For the first time in my life, I got to talk to people who actually understood my interests, and shared them. I spent hours talking with them about our shared interests, and we eventually deemed a rapport of a proper friend group, talking about the things in our lives, the good and bad. Some of those online friendships turned into real-life friendships I guarantee I wouldn’t have had otherwise. That gave me a sense of optimism and self-confidence that still persists today. Without them, I honestly don’t know who or where I’d be.
In my time in some of the communities I was in, I noticed another thing. A lot of the people I got to know had complicated lives. Some were closeted queer or questioning teenagers with unsupportive family, or living under right-wing governments. Some had dysfunctional or abusive family dynamics and needed a sense of community and support. Some, like me, struggled with the effects of neurodivergence or mental illnesses. My experience with them helped me learn I had undiagnosed autism. I found out there was a reason for my social isolation, and that there were people out there who were a lot like me. I just had to find them. For myself and many others, having these connections online helped us feel grounded, appreciated, and in some cases, even helped prevented people from doing something drastic.
That being said, I’m not tone-deaf. There are issues that need to be addressed. As I stated earlier, there are abusers who seek to exploit vulnerable teens by forcing them into doing harmful and in some cases even illegal things. These were concerns in the communities I was in, although thankfully there were responsible individuals who did their best to get rid of them. There’s also the larger fact that the networks we interact on are controlled by corporations who care more about their bottom lines than they do about keeping anyone of any age safe. However, I don’t think the solution to these issues is simply taking away access to something that serves as a lifeline to marginalized teens, to people like I was. At best, it’s demoralizing, and at worst, it puts people at risk.
Our governments have to take steps to address these challenges. I am perfectly willing to voice their concerns so that we can find actual solutions to helping minors, and I believe many others are as well. I’d like to see more action taken against abusers, to create online safe spaces where minors can safely interact, moderated by trusted adults who know how to responsibly intervene. I want stronger child protection laws and foster care systems that let children escape bad family situations without the danger of losing their futures. I want a pushback against so-called “parental rights” laws that seek to push at-risk kids to suicide. The day governments stop engaging in cheap reactionary populism and start addressing these issues with the care they deserve is the day I’ll know they’re truly interested in protecting our children and helping them thrive.
